Because I am nothing if not proactive, I am now on a few dating sites, such as OKCupid,Plenty of Fish, Fetlife, etc. Each of these has unique good points, but they all seem to have the same bad points – i.e. dudes sending messages that give a HORRIBLE first impression. There are several ways to do this:
1) Send your message from your phone as if it were a txt
how ru?
ur ht
wnt 2 trd pics?
If I wanted to date a 17 year old, the high school is right down the street from me. I would just wait for the track team to go by, with their shirts off, in all their adolescent glory, and grab the hottest, fastest, yummiest one.
Not that I have thought about that. HEY! The age of consent is 17 thank you very much!
2) Send a message with no thought put into it
Hi.
Hello.
Hey babe.
I appreciate a short hello as much as anyone, but if you send me a message like this, and then I go to your profile and it says that you like German Oompa music, and I have specifically stated my HATRED for German Oompa music, then I just start to think you did not even read my profile.
3) Instantly Sexually Inappropriate
This runs the gamut of unsolicited cock shots, to descriptions of how you want to eat my pussy all night long. Sadly, I have never seen an unsolicited cock shot that caused me to wish I had solicited it, nor do I enjoy oral sex that goes on for hours and hours. If you talked with me, you would know this.
So, how DOES one send a message to me on a dating site? A simple hello with a description of what it was from my profile that caught your eye is ALWAYS a winner. It shows you took the time to read my profile, and that you think we have more in common than possibly interlocking genitalia.
But what if you just want to convey how much you want to fuck me? Well, believe it or not, that can be done, and done successfully, although it has only happened once.
Here is a pitch perfect example of an email I got from an admirer:
“Thanks for the friending – and also for your blog – I have read the whole archive today and I’ve had an awful lot of fun in the process… you are so articulate, forthright and SO my type… Would love to share you with your husband one day – and then another day… but I don’t get to your area much.
PS: I hope you’ll write about your FIRST fisting experience some time. I’m having fun imagining it, but the real story will be better…”
That was a verifiable panty remover. It was followed by many more exchanges, and checking of identities etc, but, damn. It worked :)
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